How to tell if you’re only a so-so parent:
1. You walk into the room and your son, standing in front of yet another sofa-cushion fort, gets that deer-in-headlights look, throws his arms in the air and exclaims, “We’re just building a raccoon home so don’t get all scream-y.” His meaning is emphasized by an exaggerated eye roll and wild, waving hands.
2. You hope your son doesn’t get into “the perfect school” that will challenge him and cater to his individual needs because it’s too far away to drive twice a day.
3. You suggest that your child finish eating the raisins he dumped on the floor before you give him any more.
4. You bribe your kids with cookies to play nicely without Mommy while you blog about what a bad mommy you are.
Disclaimer: The mom described in the above passages may or may not be a fictional character but is definitely not you. But if these scenarios were familiar enough to make you wonder, that would mean I’m not alone in the world – so tell me!